The Worst Lyrics Of All Time (2022)

Last week I wrote about the best lyrics. It's only natural when thinking about the best of something to also think about the worst. As I did with the best lyrics I put out a call on social media for the worst lyrics and I got some great answers, below.

I then took it further and decided to delve into the worst songs of all time, which is of course subjective. My worst song could easily and understandably be someone else's wedding song.

Music is, for the most part, subjective. I say for the most part because when I started Googling worst songs of all time I found some songs that very simply there is no room for debate. It's like when Billy Crystal says to Meg Ryan in When Harry Met Sally, "I don't think it's a matter of opinion. Empirically you are attractive."

Empirically, songs like Black Lace's "Agadoo," voted worst song of all time in 2003 by a poll of music writers in Q magazine; DJ Pauly D's "Beat Dat Beat (It's Time To)," an aural atrocity that is an unquestioned crime against humanity; Cheeky Girls' "The Cheeky Song (Touch My Bum)," another British insult to music and the world that was voted No 1 worst pop record by Channel 4 viewers in the U.K., and Double Take's absolutely offensive "Hot Problems," maybe the worst written song of all time, about "hot girls with problems too," are beyond awful.

Yet, what I did not count on, was how surprisingly fun it is to immerse yourself in the worst songs of all time. For music lovers who take their love of their favorite bands, song and albums seriously enough to tattoo lyrics on their body; spend life savings on collectible albums, concert tickets and memorabilia, or argue for days over best Steely Dan song, there is something relaxing about letting down the intensity and just enjoying music as a novelty.

So in the spirit of fun, below are the songs named by others as the worst-written tunes of all time, as well as my list of worst-written songs ever. Again, I know there are songs on here others love. But my list and as I told others who argued, make your own list of the worst song ever. It's actually really fun.


Best Travel Insurance CompaniesByAmy DaniseEditor
Best Covid-19 Travel Insurance PlansByAmy DaniseEditor

Worst songs:

Justin Bieber, "Yummy"

I have nothing against the Biebs and as someone who's seen firsthand the tremendous strain fame can put on people, as a human I am very happy to see Bieber seemingly together in life. But that does not make this inanity of this song forgivable. I know this was supposed to be edgy, but you can totally picture a five-year-old on the playground singing this. "Yeah, you got that yummy-yum/that yummy-yum, that yummy-yummy." Someone got paid for that?! And what about this gem of a line? "Bona fide stallion/Ain't in no stable, no, you stay on the run."

Kings Of Leon, "Sex On Fire"

Here is a perfect example of the subjectivity of music. Many people loved this song, despite such deep lyrics as, "Hot as a fever/Rattling bones/I could just taste it/Chased it." Or this literary masterpiece? "Soft lips are open/Them knuckles are pale/Feels like you're dying/You're dying." But, in my humble opinion, one of the worst songs of all time and one of the worst written. Just overall awful.

Sam Hunt, "Body Like A Back Road"

How, how, how in the freaking world did this second-rate "Your Body Is A Wonderland" get nominated at the CMA's for Song Of The Year, which is a songwriter's award? This shouldn't even be nominated for a middle school poetry award let alone a major songwriters award. Worst lyrics: Take your pick. "The way she fit in them blue jeans/She don't need no belt/But I can turn 'em inside out/I don't need no help/Got hips like honey/So thick and so sweet (Man)/Ain't no curves like hers/On them downtown streets." And that might not even be the worst line in this. Ugh.

Winger, "Seventeen"

There is a special place in musical hell for hair metal. And in some of the worst-written songs of all time this might be the worst line of all: "Daddy says she's too young/But she's old enough for me." Just shut the hell up.

Kid Rock, "American Bad Ass"

Sometimes lines just tell you the truth: "Chosen one, I'm the living proof/With the gift of gab from the city of truth/I jabbed and stabbed and knocked critics back/

And I did not stutter." What more can be said?

LFO, "Summer Girls"

One of the worst songs of the '90s, and that is saying something, this pop fluff had some of the most insipid lyrics ever. "Billy Shakespeare wrote a whole bunch of sonnets/Call me Willy Whistle 'cause I can't speak, baby/Something in your eyes went and drove me crazy/Now I can't forget you and it makes me mad." Billy Shakespeare would roll over in his grave at being cited in this pop insanity.

Nickelback, "How You Remind Me"

The song opens, "Never made it as a wise man/I couldn't cut it as a blind man stealing/Tired of living like a blind man/I'm sick of sight without a sense of feeling." One of the surest ways to write a bad lyric is to take yourself too damn seriously. And this couplet, coupled with Chad Kroeger's deep, booming, "I am an artist," vocal, just lends itself to be made fun of.

Bryan Adams, "Everything I Do"

Bryan Adams has written some great songs, "Summer Of '69," "Cuts Like A Knife," the whole Reckless album was strong. But he's also written some of the cheesiest, schmaltziest stuff ever recorded by man. And this one, from the Robin Hood, Prince Of Thieves film, is up there with the worst of them. "There's no love/Like your love/And no other could give more love." Really, couldn't find anything that rhymed with love?

Beach Boys, "Kokomo"

Everything about this song is criminal, from the awful melody to the insipid lyrics. "Aruba, Jamaica, oh I want to take ya/Bermuda, Bahama, come on pretty mama/Key Largo, Montego, baby why don't we go, Jamaica." Not only one of the worst written songs ever just one of the worst songs ever period.

Songs from others:

Aqua, "Barbie Girl"

Cited by multiple people, and with good reason. "I'm a Barbie girl/in the Barbie world/Life in plastic, it's fantastic/You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere." Uh-huh.

R.E.M., "Shiny Happy People"

R.E.M. are one of the greatest bands of all time, no question. But even the best have their failings. And I once saw Michael Stipe introduced this as one of the dumbest songs ever written. Can't argue with Stipe. "Everyone around, love them, love them/Put it in your hands, take it, take it/There's no time to cry, happy, happy

Put it in your heart where tomorrow shines/Gold and silver shine." I don't know what that means.

Sisqo, "The Thong Song"

"I like it when the beat goes/Duh dun duh/Baby make your booty go/Duh dun duh/Baby I know you want to show/Duh dun duh/That thong thong thong thong thong." Civilization is stupider for the fact this song exists.

Black Eyed Peas, "My Humps"

Another song with multiple votes. And as much as I like the Peas and have spent a great deal of time with them, hard to defend this one. "I'ma get get get get you drunk/Get you love drunk off my hump/My hump my hump my hump my hump my hump/My hump my hump my hump my lovely little lumps."

Styx, "Mr. Roboto"

The song starts, "Domo arigato misuta Robotto/Domo arigato misuta Robotto/Mata au hi made/Domo arigato misuta Robotto/Himitsu wo shiritai." Has there ever been a geekier rock hit? Maybe not.

Starship, "We Built This City"

Once again, file this under great band missteps. Lines like "Knee deep in the hoopla," as well as one of the most annoying choruses of all time, is just one of the reasons this song has been voted among the worst songs of all time in countless polls.

Right Said Fred, "I'm Too Sexy"

"I'm too sexy for my shirt." One of the worst and stupidest lines ever written.

Top Articles

You might also like

Latest Posts

Article information

Author: Kieth Sipes

Last Updated: 09/08/2022

Views: 6343

Rating: 4.7 / 5 (67 voted)

Reviews: 90% of readers found this page helpful

Author information

Name: Kieth Sipes

Birthday: 2001-04-14

Address: Suite 492 62479 Champlin Loop, South Catrice, MS 57271

Phone: +9663362133320

Job: District Sales Analyst

Hobby: Digital arts, Dance, Ghost hunting, Worldbuilding, Kayaking, Table tennis, 3D printing

Introduction: My name is Kieth Sipes, I am a zany, rich, courageous, powerful, faithful, jolly, excited person who loves writing and wants to share my knowledge and understanding with you.